Wednesday, October 11, 2023

World Mental Health Day - Menangani Percubaan Bunuh Diri / Suicide Attempts

Hari Kesihatan Mental Sedunia disambut pada 10 Oktober setiap tahun

Semalam merupakan World Mental Health Day. Bercakap tentang mental health / kesihatan mental ni, bulan lepas aku join webinar bertajuk "Shining a Light on Suicide Prevention" yang dianjurkan oleh Naluri. Webinar ni percuma je, jadi apa salahnya kita menimba ilmu tentang kesihatan mental dari pakar kesihatan mental kan.

Bunuh diri merupakan punca kematian keempat tertinggi di kalangan anak muda lingkungan usia 15 - 29 tahun dalam Malaysia

Tau tak korang, kematian dari perbuatan bunuh diri merupakan punca kematian keempat tertinggi di kalangan anak muda lingkungan usia 15 - 29 tahun dalam Malaysia? Kes bunuh diri di Malaysia meningkat dari 10% ke 13.1% dalam masa 5 tahun kebelakang. Menurut satu kajian WHO dan kajian tempatan, bagi setiap kes kematian akibat bunuh diri, terdapat 10 - 20 percubaan bunuh diri yang terjadi. 

Kecenderungan tingkah laku bunuh diri di kalangan remaja (sumber: Sinniah, A., Maniam, T., Sidi, H., & Oei, T. (2014). Suicide ideation and intent in Malaysia: A review of the literature. Comprehensive Psychiatry, 55(1), 95- 100.)

Faktor-Faktor Mendorong Tindakan Bunuh Diri

Antara faktor-faktor yang mendorong seseorang untuk bertindak membunuh diri ialah:

1. Masalah hubungan (pasangan, ibu bapa, rakan-rakan) 
2. Menghidapi penyakit mental (kemurungan, stress dan keresahan) 
3. Faktor-faktor sosial (etnik, ketiadaan pekerjaan tetap dan media (Internet dan media sosial).

Terdapat kajian yang mengaitkan seseorang yang menghabiskan masa yang banyak di hadapan skrin (TV / gajet) lebih berisiko untuk membunuh diri! 

Sebenarnya, individu yang mempunyai tingkah laku bunuh diri ni secara tak sedar menunjukkan tanda-tanda sebelum dia mengambil tindakan. Jadi kawan-kawan atau ahli keluarga yang berada di sekeliling perlu peka dengan tanda-tanda seperti kerap menjauhkan diri, tidak suka bergaul, perubahan sikap yang mendadak (contohnya dari ceria kepada murung atau perubahan emosi mendadak/mood swings), bertanya soalan yang pelik dan berkisar tentang kematian atau kehilangan, memberikan barang-barang yang dihargai kepada orang lain dan banyak lagi tanda-tanda lain yang di luar kebiasaan seseorang yang kita kenal.

Pendekatan Mencegah Dari Tindakan Bunuh Diri

Macamana kalau orang yang berniat nak bunuh diri tu ialah diri-sendiri atau ahli keluarga terdekat? Menurut pakar psikologi, kebanyakan kes bunuh diri boleh dicegah. Antara pendekatan yang boleh diambil untuk mencegah dari tindakan bunuh diri ialah:

1. Peka terhadap perubahan sikap yang ditunjukkan. Bila seseorang menunjukkan perubahan sikap, dapatkan pertolongan pakar / kerap bertanya khabar individu tersebut.
2. Berterus-terang. Sekiranya kita perasan seseorang tu menunjukkan tingkah laku membunuh diri, tanya secara terus-terang sebab mungkin ini akan menyelamatkan nyawanya.
3. Sekiranya tidak mampu memberi nasihat / pertolongan, dapatkan bantuan dari orang lain / bantuan khidmat profesional untuk memberi pertolongan kepada rakan / ahli keluarga yang berisiko.
4. Tanya soalan dan dengar. Tanyakan situasi mereka dan dengar luahan perasaan mereka supaya mereka tahu yang mereka tidak berseorangan di dunia ini.
5. Bantu mereka mencari sebab untuk meneruskan kehidupan. Ingatkan mereka tentang sebab kenapa mereka perlu meneruskan kehidupan dengan memberi galakan kepada mereka.
6. Bantu mereka untuk membuat perancangan selamat. Rancang aktiviti selamat (contohnya berkurung dalam bilik kosong tanpa ada peralatan berbahaya) dan senaraikan kontak rapat untuk dihubungi sekiranya mereka terdetik untuk menamatkan riwayat.

Itulah serba-serbi maklumat yang disampaikan oleh pakar psikologi dalam webinar yang aku sertai tu. Semoga perkongsian ni membantu sekiranya ada orang yang kita kenali berdepan dengan masalah-masalah peribadi sampai terfikir nak menamatkan riwayat hidup.

*Hubungi talian bantuan Befrienders di 03-79568145 sekiranya berdepan dengan situasi percubaan / rancangan membunuh diri.

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Saturday, December 17, 2022

Accu-Chek Guide Me Memudahkan Ambil Bacaan Gula Dalam Darah

Macam biasa, setiap kali aku pregnant mulalah timbul simptom-simptom GDM ni. Bila ko ada PCOS, diabetes ni memang susah nak dielakkan. Apa lagi bila sejenis yang suka makan macam aku ni 😅

Walaupun selepas aku keguguran, result HbA1c aku masih lagi tak cantik. Sudahnya doktor suruh aku monitor bacaan gula dalam darah selain aku dah start kena makan ubat diabetes (metformin) dalam dos yang rendah. Hmm. Ikut je la nasihat doktor kalau tak nak melarat kan.

10 tahun lepas masa aku pregnant dengan Khadeeja, aku memang kena monitor gula tiap-tiap hari tapi syukurlah masa tu aku tak payah cucuk insulin. Glukometer ni aku beli masa tu untuk monitor bacaan gula, tapi dah hilang masa kiteorang berpindah-randah tiga kali dalam 10 tahun ni.

Glukometer yang aku guna 10 tahun lepas

Memandangkan glukometer lama dah hilang, aku pun cari glukometer baru dan terjumpa yang ini:

Accu-chek Guide Me (dari kiri: pen cucuk, test strip, glukometer)

Apa yang menarik perhatian aku ialah glukometer ni siap ada apps yang boleh sync dengan Apple Health. Apa-apa gajet kesihatan yang boleh sync dengan Apple Health sebagai central database tentang maklumat kesihatan memang a plus point untuk aku. Senang bila jumpa doktor untuk routine checkup bukak je maklumat semua ada kat situ. 

Aku masih ingat lagi houseman kat wad hospital hari tu sangat impressed bila aku tunjuk period cycle aku setahun dengan cuma bukak Apple Health je. Aku tunjuk pun sebab dia houseman yang keberapa entah singgah kat katil tanya benda yang sama (kak, last period bila? Average period cycle akak berapa lama? blabla...). Bosan pulak kena repeat jawapan banyak-banyak kali. 

Anyway, back to Accu-chek Guide Me. Gajet ni datang memang dah pre-set up (tak perlu nak set tarikh, masa dsb.), senang tinggal tekan butang ON dan masukkan test strip je.

Langkah-langkah sebelum guna:

1. Muat turun apps mySugr (kod QR ada dalam leaflet instructions)
2. Daftar akaun. ON bluetooth dan tambah glukometer dalam apps.

Langkah-langkah pemakaian:

1. Sanitize hujung jari yang nak cucuk tu dengan alcohol swab (selalunya seller bagi sekali bila beli set lengkap glukometer ni)
2. Masukkan test strip dalam glukometer
3. Cucuk hujung jari dengan pen cucuk
4. Letak sampel darah dekat hujung test strip
5. Tunggu glukometer proses bacaan gula dalam darah
6. Glukometer akan sync rekod bacaan di apps

Bacaan gula 3 jam lepas sarapan

Bacaan gula sebelum makan tengahari

Sebelum ni pun aku pakai jenama Accu-chek tapi model lain (Accu-chek Performa). Lancet (jarum) kena masukkan dan tukar setiap kali sesi mencucuk jari ni. Accu-chek Guide Me ni pulak pakai FastClix lancet macam kartrij. Dalam satu kartrij ni ada 6 bilah jarum. Setiap kali lepas cucuk, leretkan butang putih dekat batang pen tu untuk tukar jarum kat dalam. Lepas 6x cucuk, barulah tukar kartrij yang baru. Senang dan selamat sebab jarum tu tak terdedah. 

Kartrij FastClix

Aku beli kartrij ekstra sebab set glukometer tu cuma bagi satu kartrij percuma

Dalam apps MySugr kita boleh rekod apa makanan yang kita ambik hari tu. Tak nak tulis pun tak pe, ambik gambar je lepas tu pilih kategori masa makan (sarapan / makan tengahari / snek / makan malam). Tapi kalau rajin nak tulis dan Google jumlah nutrisi dipersilakan. Aku rajin awal-awal je lepas tu aku dah malas, setakat ambik gambar je hehe.

Apps ni boleh generate report lepas tu boleh muat turun report bacaan gula kita tapi aku rasa report tu macam tak berapa terperinci. Tak tau la, tu pendapat aku, mungkin doktor rasa ok je kot sebab mesti syarikat ni develop format ni lepas dapatkan pandangan pakar perubatan ye tak?

Rekod bacaan gula dalam seminggu

Yang bawah ni pulak rekod dalam Apple Health. Sebenarnya doktor nak tengok seimbas lalu je range bacaan gula dalam darah kita, kalau tak cantik barulah dia tanya. Contohnya dia nak tau apa yang aku makan sampai bacaan gula aku 8.49 mmol/L (5.0 mmol/L ialah bacaan normal) dan kenapa aku hampir hypo (3.9 mmol/L ialah paras hypo).

Kenapa kena ambil ubat diabetes?

Bila tengok bacaan ni memang patut kena pantau sebab tak stabil. Selalu aku baca kat socmed orang mengelak dari ambik ubat kencing manis sebab takut jadi bergantung dengan ubat tu seumur hidup. Ni tanggapan yang SALAH. Contoh terbaik ialah mak aku. Bertahun-tahun dia kena ambik ubat kencing manis. Tapi sejak dia kena kanser 2 tahun lepas, banyak benda dia tak boleh makan sebab tekaknya masih tak boleh terima. Lepas sembuh dari kanser, berat badannya susut mendadak dan bacaan gula pun jadi elok balik. Alhamdulillah, kiranya ni hikmah di sebalik ujian kanser tu. Sekarang mak dah TAK PERLU makan ubat kencing manis. Tapi ubat darah tinggi dia still kena ambik.

Ubat metformin (ubat diabetes) ni aku kena ambik untuk bantu tubuh aku handle insulin dengan baik. Bila ambik ubat ni, bacaan gula jadi lebih rendah dan terkawal. Tapi tak bermaksud lepas tu boleh la makan benda-benda tinggi gula sewenang-wenangnya sebab kalau tak jaga pemakanan, dos ubat ni makin tinggi sampai satu tahap ubat ni mungkin jadi tak berkesan lagi. 

Satu lagi kesan sampingan pengambilan ubat metformin ni ialah bantu tekanan darah aku jadi normal. Kalau sebelum ni aku ambik ubat darah tinggi, tekanan darah aku turun sikit tapi masih kategori tinggi walaupun stabil pada tahap 1 hipertensi. Stage 3 dah tahap krisis dan perlu dapatkan rawatan kesihatan dengan segera sebelum berlakunya risiko pembuluh darah pecah dan mengakibatkan strok atau pendarahan otak. Masa aku keguguran tempoh hari, tekanan darah aku sampai stage 3 sebab tu aku terus pergi wad kecemasan. Tekanan darah ni jangan buat main-main.

Barulah aku sedar yang gula dalam darah ni boleh trigger tekanan darah tinggi, bila gula dalam darah tak terkawal automatik tekanan darah pun jadi tinggi. Tapi punca utama ialah STRESS. Bila asyik stress je, hormon badan boleh jadi insulin resistance, lepas tu gula dalam darah tinggi dan tekanan darah naik. Tekanan darah naik, pembuluh darah mengeras lepas tu efek kat jantung pulak sampai ada yang kena serangan jantung. Pendek kata, jagalah kesihatan emosi dan kawal tahap STRESS dalam hidup kita ye. 

Kesimpulannya bila aku dah kena start monitor kesihatan di usia 40-an ni, gajet-gajet kesihatan ni memang membantu sebab kadang-kadang aku tak sempat pun nak catat bacaan gula / tekanan darah dalam buku. Bila nak jumpa doktor, barulah nampak rongak sana-sini rekod tu. Accu-Chek Guide Me ni memudahkan bagi aku sebab siap tolong sync terus bacaan tu dalam handphone jadi bila pergi jumpa doktor untuk routine checkup maklumat tu semua dalam handphone tinggal nak bukak kat apps dan tunjuk dengan doktor je.

Aku beli glukometer Accu-Chek Guide Me ni kat Shopee, boleh klik LINK INI. Harga dalam RM139.90 untuk satu set termasuk FastClix pen, 50 test strip dan glukometer, sekali dengan beg. Tidaklah mahal sangat jika dibandingkan dengan kesihatan pada usia aku sekarang.

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Thursday, October 10, 2024

Hari Kesihatan Mental Sedunia

Selamat Menyambut Hari Kesihatan Mental Sedunia 2024

Korang tau tak, menurut Prudential Malaysia, 1 dalam 3 rakyat Malaysia pada masa sekarang ni mengalami masalah kesihatan mental? Masalah kesihatan mental ialah suatu penyakit yang sukar didiagnosis dan kadang-kadang dianggap sebagai remeh tapi sekiranya seseorang mengalami tekanan perasaan yang melampau dan berpanjangan (atau disebut tekanan kronik atau chronic stress), ianya juga mampu menjejaskan kesihatan fizikal dan keupayaan seseorang untuk berfikir. Stress yang tak terkawal ialah salah satu punca utama seseorang menghidap tekanan darah tinggi dan juga penyakit jantung.

Menyedari kepentingan menjaga kesihatan mental, WHO telah menetapkan 10 Oktober sebagai Hari Kesihatan Mental sedunia. Tahun ni temanya ialah Kesihatan Mental di Tempat Kerja. Zaman pandemik menyebabkan tahap kesihatan mental pekerja merosot dengan teruk - kebimbangan tentang status pekerjaan dan kewangan, tekanan menguruskan keluarga dan bekerja di rumah pada masa yang sama, beban kerja yang melampaui keupayaan pekerja dan kes buli (majikan meletakkan work expectation yang tak masuk akal, diskriminasi kerja dsb.) menjadikan masalah kesihatan mental sebagai sesuatu yang tak boleh dipandang ringan lagi. Masalah ni berlarutan sampai la ke sekarang.

Aku sedih bila dengar kawan-kawan di tempat kerja yang terpaksa ambik cuti sakit berpanjangan sebab mengalami masalah depresi, lagi-lagi disebabkan tekanan kerja. Tekanan kerja ni banyak puncanya - selalunya dari hubungan tak baik dengan boss atau rakan sekerja, budaya kerja yang toksik, bebanan kerja yang melampau, skop kerja tak sepadan dengan keupayaan dan kelayakan pekerja dan banyak lagi. Yang selalu aku dengar ialah masalah kerja ni berpunca dari tak ngam dengan bos sendiri atau dengan skop posisi kerja sekarang. Kadang-kadang bila boss atas dengan boss sendiri tak ngam, staff pun tersepit di tengah-tengah. Yang sakitnya staff la sebab kena layan expectation berbeza dua-dua boss yang tak ngam ni.

So, buat kawan-kawan yang masih bekerja dan mengalami tekanan kerja, please take care of your mental health ya. Ya, kerja tu penting untuk kelangsungan hidup tapi tak la sampai kena mengorbankan kesihatan mental dan fizikal kita. Take the time to do self-care; salah satunya dengan membaca dan menghayati Al-Quran, bermeditasi/ berzikir/ journaling (blogging salah satu caranya), melakukan aktiviti hobi atau kesukaan, keluar berjalan-jalan dan YES, AMBIK CUTI untuk berehat! (Hehe, yang last ni ditujukan buat Suami Terchenta).

Dekat sini aku nak sertakan pautan video teknik-teknik menangani tekanan perasaan. Semoga ianya bermanfaat untuk kawan-kawan.

Selamat Menyambut Hari Kesihatan Mental Sedunia!

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Sunday, December 19, 2021

LETTER TO MY GIRLS: KHAYLA (11 YEARS OLD) AND KHADEEJA (9 YEARS OLD)

To my beautiful princesses,

Last week you both celebrated your birthday. Happy birthday my girls! I pray that you both grow up successful, happy & fulfilled. I pray you both will be the pride of Islam, our family and the nation. I pray that you both will be the reasons both me & your father enter Paradise, with a grateful heart that Allah has given us the opportunity to raise you well.

My beautiful girls

As usual, my letter will be addressed to each of you, starting with my forever baby girl, Khadeeja.

My dearest little Khadeeja,

The pandemic has been a blessing in disguise because over the past 2 years I learned a lot of things about you which made me realise that I am still far from being a good mom.

When school moved from classroom to online, I saw how you struggled with even the most mundane thing - communicating. At first I thought you were being stubborn because I know you don't like learning Chinese. It turned out you were so overwhelmed with fear, that you were not able to utter a single word because you couldn't understand the language.

Occasionally I 'forced' you (by force I mean I clicked 'raise hand' button despite your protests during online class) to speak up in class and I saw how you froze and couldn't utter a single word until your teacher had to guide you. I did it because I naively thought I was helping you to realise there's nothing to be afraid of to speak up. The truth is, I am just escalating your fear.

I brought you to see a psychologist and learnt about selective mutism. The session made me realise what a domineering mom I am and left me feeling awful for ignoring your anxiety. There I was at work, advocating mental health at workplace and listening to staff when they spoke of their mental health, but I failed to do the same to you. I heard you when you begged to change school but I did not listen properly to your fear. I just assumed you will overcome it without realising that I'm making you reject the language harder. When I tried to encourage you to converse in Chinese, you fought back, 'Why do you want me to be good in Chinese? I don't like to speak Chinese!' It took a psychologist to validate your feeling for us to believe you but it shouldn't be that way. I am so sorry, my love.

Sometimes in class, you draw an unhappy face or monsters 

Now that we finally understand what you were going through, we have agreed to take you out of Chinese school and to an English medium school much to your joy. I think the most heartbreaking moment to me was when you came up to me and whispered, 'Thank you Mommy. I hope I can answer teachers' questions in class after this.'

You wish you can find your voice in an environment that doesn't frighten you

Khadeeja my love,

From the day you were born, you have this indescribable determination that I most often mistaken as stubbornness. Did you know when you were days old you cried until your face turned blue because you did not like your pacifiers and wanted the real deal? My most fondest memory of the stubborn you is of your two-year old self trying to push your own tricycle up the steep driveway. The tricycle was as big as your petite body, but with a loud scream and the determination of Hercules, you managed it. You also managed to drag the red rubber pony toy that matched your size up the staircase because you wanted to.

As you grew up, this trait continued. When you wanted something, you set your mind to get it no matter what it takes. There was a time when you wanted to buy a toy but when I asked if you have the money, you decided to sell snacks to us so you can raise enough fund to buy the toy.

In the midst of playing video games, I caught you psyching yourself up, 'Come on Khadeeja, you can do this!' which is both endearing and exasperating as well - why can't you show the same grit and courage when it comes to studying?

Once in a blue moon when you focused in your class 

You are also super funny and you love making us laugh. Telling jokes and making funny faces are your favourite gimmicks to crack us up. You love teasing Bapak, and then running screaming and laughing when he tries to catch you. Who does that remind him of, eh? 😜 (ahem... throwback to the early days of marriage when we used to played chase around the house!)

Always the funny one

My amazing daughter,

You resemble me in more ways than I expected. One thing that I noticed is you are also a Timekeeper (someone who writes for the future self) like me. While I writes in my diary, you write letters to your future self. You remind your future self to not forget about the past, to cherish the memories and that's basically me.

When you wrote a letter to your future

You also take after my love for cooking and baking. You even requested me to make videos of your cooking tutorials. Lately I'm into baking bread and buns, which you love as you get to help me to knead the dough. I hope one day you look back at this memory of us baking bread, bun & cakes and cooking our favourite meals, with love and nostalgia.

Showing off your first bun to Makyeng

Now on to my firstborn daughter, Khayla.

To my pride & joy Khayla,

Once I cannot imagine having a baby. Now, I can't imagine the baby grew up so fast and she's now almost a teenager. You are now in the in-between phase of a little child and an unknown entity that all parents dread. Frankly, I don't know how to deal with that. I have not updated my parenting manual to include raising a teenager. I heard it's going to be a rough journey, but I hope it won't be the case with you.

Already dressed up like a teenager

My sweet little lady,

You used to be a bossy big sister with a loud voice and a happy go lucky manner. You cheered us up with your singing, your bright smile and your sweet nature. As I watch you transform from that cheerful little girl to a young lady, your voice has softened and you are pretty much a more mellow personality. You remain the sweetest girl who always has a positive outlook, who is always careful when choosing your words to express your opinions so as not to hurt the other person.

For example, when I ask whose porridge you love either mine or Makyeng's, you would reply that you love both but you would eat Makyeng's porridge more. This diplomacy of yours shows maturity beyond your age.

Always with a half-smile on your face

My beautiful girl,

There are certain characters of yours that I admire and wish I can be more like you too. For example, you always take things easy. Unlike myself and Khadeeja, you don't get stressed out or ruffled easily. Online class can happen while you lounge on the bed or the sofa. Sometimes when I lecture at you, you smile and agree with me. There was a time when I scolded you for forgetting Khadeeja's name card when fetching her from school and you just smiled and replied apologetically. I wonder what have I done to deserve such a sweet daughter?

Sometimes the sight of you so chilled while attending your online class makes Khadeeja envious

You are also super friendly with others, be it someone you know or total strangers. The strangest habit of yours is waving at strangers and they often wave back with a puzzled expression  (they must be racking their brains trying to recall if they knew you). You greet the security guards and the makcik cleaners cheerfully, and you make friends with other kids as easily.

Making new friends while playing ice skating

You make me proud in so many ways but the one I'm proudest of is how you have become independent in your daily life. Perhaps this is something you learnt when one parent was far away and the other parent was busy working. You learnt to look after yourself and adik during school holidays when I had to work and leave both of you alone at home.

You don't need telling to wash your own beak, do your homework,  iron your school uniform and even make your own breakfast

Khayla my love,

I know entering teenage years can be difficult. The raging hormones can turn your mood upside down. Already you prefer to alienate yourself in the room either listening to music, sketching on my iPad, reading your favourite Cat Warrior novel or just texting your friends - rather than spend time with us. This really hurts Khadeeja because she does not have any friend except you and now you are starting to ignore her requests to play with her. 

You also hate taking photos even family photos so it's always a hard work trying to get you to participate in a family photo.

Bapak has to put his arms around you to stop you from running away during photo session

There are times when you start to get moody over simple things we ask of you like joining us on grocery trips, or taking a shower etc. It's like you want to exist in a world of your own, away from other people - which I get it because I too was there. But family's important, ok? These years with mommy, Bapak & Khadeeja will pass in the blink of an eye, and someday you will miss it. That is why I always insist for you to be in the family moment despite your protests and sulks.

Sulky mood

You normally balk when we ask you to join us for cycling around the neighbourhood but will be back to normal after a while

I am scared to be honest, that I won't know how to raise a teenage girl. People said at this age parents should treat their teenage child like their best friend most of the time while also establishing authority in certain areas. Often times I still treat you like a little girl, giving out instructions and reprimanding you if you don't do it as per my expectations. You seem hesitant now to make your own decisions because I have always dictate everything from what clothes to wear to how to do house chores, and will scold you if you make a different decision than mine. I am sorry Khayla for treating you this way. I promise to allow you to make your own decision, so you will learn to be more independent when it comes to decision-making.

When I allow you to express your fashion sense even though I have to hold my tongue

One thing though, I am grateful is you still love to be cuddled and kissed. I know some kids your age feel it's not cool to hug and cuddle with parents but you are not them. Both of you are still very manja with us, and mommy & Bapak cherish this while it lasts.

You look so grown up despite being just 11 years old

Finally my darling daughters,

Let's talk about the bond between you both. I just want to say how proud and happy I am that you both have gotten very close in recent years compared to when you were smaller. You both are like best friends, always playing Toka Boka game, sketching and playing Sylvanian Families together.

Back when you were smaller, you were always competing with each other. This photo taken by Makyeng is a rare moment indeed

Our love for you both knows no limits. Know that your father & I will always support you both as best as we can. You both have given us so much love and happiness, more than we ever deserved. Thank you, my darlings.

The loves of my life

Yours Until Forever & More,

Mommy

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Thursday, July 05, 2012

Not in the best of health...

*snott... snooottttt*

*cough cough*

*SNOOTTTTTTTTTTT....*

My body is under invasion. This sly creature called virus have sneakily entered my body and take over my immune system. All my white cells have abandoned their posts and rush to the most important part of my body - my baby. So, that leaves me all alone - vulnerable to the ambush attack launched by the virus.

*more groans and coughing*

So off I went to a clinic after work. I almost peed coughing while waiting for my turn to see the doctor. 

The result - 2 days sick leave!

Have been spending the two days at home recuperating (sleeping). And since I felt bored yesterday, I requested that Khayla spent her time today at home with me. 

Excuse me, time for our afternoon nap.

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Tuesday, January 15, 2013

Letter to My Girls: Khayla (25 months) & Khadeeja (1 month)

Dear Khayla & Khadeeja,

Wow. Time sure flies fast, dear ones. I am now mother to two beautiful baby girls since a month ago! What an exhilarating feeling it is :)

Let me start with Khadeeja, my younger child.

Khadeeja - Day 3

Khadeeja my precious,

My second child born on the first day of the second month in 1434H of the Islamic calendar (1.2.34). Also, the second child of ours to be born on our wedding anniversary (15 December 2012). You are named after Saidatina Khadijah R.A., the beloved wife of Rasulullah S.A.W. She was a wise businesswoman as well as a strong and loyal woman who stood by her husband. Khadeeja, my strong little one who was a survivor since you were a teeny-weeny embryo. Haha! Remember that rough trip into the jungle when you were just a little over 4 weeks in my tummy? With you, I never had to worry about your survival, not even the hardest of bumps can faze  you! Roarrr! Khadeeja, the warrior!

Khadeeja - Day 4

With that kind of strong determination to survive, you also show a strong character to match. You came out screaming as loud as a baby could cry the moment my gynae pulled you out of my open tummy. It's like you were complaining, 'What abomination is this to disturb my slumber in my warm cocoon?' It's no wonder - you came out a week or two earlier than you were supposed to so I get your utter indignation, child. But let's not dwell too much on it, ok?

If that is not enough proof that you are one fierce dragon (born in the year of dragon, perhaps that's the reason?), you have no qualms about turning your cries several octaves higher until you were shrieking in total fury whenever you were being ignored. Like, 'I want milk now please? Now, now, NOW, NOWWWWWWW!!!!' 'A minute, please wait, I need to pee, I need to drink first, or any other excuses are not tolerated AT ALL. Phew. Khadeeja, can we work on that temper of yours when you realise that Mommy is the one with the ultimate power?

I woke up on the wrong side of the crib this morning...

My darling baby,

Despite your strong character, you have the loveliest smile with the cutest dimple on your right cheek. Courtesy of Mommy, of course! Now I can understand the adage, 'When you smile, the world smiles with you'. You are that cute that I have two people telling me that looking at you make them feel like having a baby of their own!

Khadeeja - Day 19

My pumpkin pie with a dash of chilli powder,

Now let's talk about your milestones this month. Today marks your first of the many more birthday months. Happy one month old, sweetheart! Throughout this month, you've learned to:

1. Lift your head briefly when on your tummy and a lot longer when you are in upright position (yeay, baby!)
2. Gaze around you in interest for a few seconds before starting to look for Mommy's nipples to suck on for the umpteenth time
3. Coo when your sister teased you or when you don't agree with our complaints about your constant need to be carried and nursed
4. This may sound unbelievable but you can flip yourself from your side to your tummy position when you notice that I get too far from you. First attempt is to stretch your body, then bat your hands to reach out to me and finally all the stretching and batting will result in the body flip. Hey, aren't babies supposed to flip from back to front when they are around 3 months old?
5. Recognize who is not mommy.

Being fascinated with your fist (Khadeeja, Day 29)

Today, after sending off grandma and sister to the airport, you had your first month checkup and the doctor gave your health a clean bill and also your first month jab. You glared at the sweet doctor, screwed up your face and wailed! Ah, life with you will be an adventurous one for me, Khadeeja.

Khadeeja - Day 32

Now to my firstborn, Khayla.

My dearest Khayla,

You have been a big sister for a month now. Your first reaction to Khadeeja was total indifference, like, oh a baby. I'll just play a bit till the baby goes away. So it was kind of amusing to watch you when you realize that the baby did not go away but instead went home with us to stay permanently. That's when you started to show your jealousy.

Practising to be a big sister a day before Khadeeja was born

You tried to push her away when I nursed Khadeeja. You shouted, 'Hey, kennen!' (Translated - 'hey, cannot!') to protest that she slept on the bed with us. You demanded to be breastfeed also. And everything that is Khadeeja's now belongs to you e.g. her toys and her pacifiers. Especially her pacifiers.

Refused to let Khadeeja lie down in the cot and claiming her pacifier as yours

Then two weeks later, you realized that she wasn't going away. That she is part of the family now. That's when you start to show concerns and care towards Khadeeja. Like calling us to pick the baby when she cried. Or shushing the baby yourself. Or even shoving a pacifier to her wailing mouth. Or trying to feed her with a bottle of milk (yours or hers, whichever first you laid eyes on). Or helping grandma to throw away Khadeeja's soiled diapers in the waste bin. Welcome to the world of big sister, Khayla!

Big sister and small sister!

My lapis lazuli,

The day Khadeeja was born you seemed to grow up overnight. No longer we see you as a small and fragile little girl, but of a boisterous and funny two-year-old that you are. You can understand a lot of things now, except when we said 'Cannot!' Or 'Pick up your toys!'

Your vocab also grew with you. You can call Mak Yeng, say bye-bye, orange, bubble, bear-bear, nenen, Mak, Bapak and a few other words which mostly you mimic from us.

One day we were playing bubbles and they burst. You turned to me, hands spread apart and said the first complete sentence, 'Abis dah bubble!' (Bubble is finished!) Girl, not only you stringed together words to form a sentence, the words were also in perfect order, not all jumbled up! Bravo!

Entertaining your baby sister

Not only you can speak in full sentence you can sing to a tune from Babytv. Twinkle-twinkle little star is your favourite (and mine too). You know 80% of the words and will sing along to the song. You can understand the cartoons on Babytv and will laugh at the funny parts. The other day you also identified out loud a cartoon character called 'Yum-Yum' from 'The Cuddlies'. I secretly wondered whether a gear that got stuck in your brain had suddenly become unstuck and that's why you have been soaking up all the new knowledge overnight!

You love going out especially for car rides. You cried if ever anyone went out the door without offering to bring you out. You excitedly shouted, 'Walk-walk!' Then ran over to the cabinet where your shoes were kept, opened the cabinet yourself and put on your shoes on your own. Most of the time you put on the shoes correctly.

Saying 'bye-bye' because you wanted to follow Mak Yeng 'walk-walk'

And you are very funny at this age. You love being chased by Daddy. You love mimicking people's sentence, you are just like a parrot! You also have a fake laugh to make others laugh!

Often you insist to be treated like a big girl

Khayla my not-so-baby-anymore baby,

All-in-all, you provide me with the light side of life and a whole lot of sanity when things get exhausting.

Khadeeja my fierce but adorable little baby,

You reminded me that I am awesome, and worthy to be loved, by you.

To both my girls,

I love being your mother. What's life without you both, but a colorless world? Thank You, Allah for these two girls.

Khayla & Khadeeja - my precious gems

Love you both millions of time,
Mak

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Thursday, November 15, 2012

Those weeks everyone was not feeling well...

It's the time of the year again. The season full of the nasty flu bug.

Remember when I told that I had accidentally detoxed myself two weeks ago? Turned out that I actually caught the flu virus from someone and all those headache, muscle pain, blocked nose and severe coughing were NOT because of detox whatsoever.

These couple of weeks turned to be very rough and challenging for all of us in the family. As soon as I caught the flu, my whole family became infected with it as well. Hubby had it too, but he recovered fast, which is within 2 days. It's the pregnant lady and a fragile baby who struggled to fight against the virus.

Let me tell you, coughing non-stop while being heavily pregnant was a very unpleasant experience. Every time I was having cough attack, I had to clutch my lower tummy because it hurt like hell!

My medicines

But what's more horrible is being pregnant and having to care for a sick baby.

Khayla couldn't sleep well because she was having high fever (38.8 degrees Celcius people!) and because she couldn't breathe properly due to runny nose. Since she had to breathe through her mouth, several times she woke up with dry mouth and throat, so she became cranky again. My poor little girl!

Her fever lasted more than 6 days despite her taking antibiotics. When her temperature rose too high, we gave her the suppository that has to be inserted through her rectum.

It brought her relief for a few hours but after that the stubborn fever returned and we had to give her paracetamol again. And cold med. Cough mixture. Something to relief the phlegm. There. So many medicines that she hates but had to swallow.

Night time was a nightmare for us parents. In the middle of the night she woke up crying and kicking up a fuss because she only wanted to sleep on my arm. Most of the time I had to refuse because in the morning I'd wake up with backache from leaning too far on my side. Another reason I had to let her down is because she got annoyed with my growing tummy that gets in the way. She'll kick my tummy so much so that I have to wake hubby to pass her to him.

To sum up the past few weeks we had little sleep taking care of Khayla. Both of us were jaded and weary.

Daytime was no better. Her runny nose was worse, and she cried a lot. She only wanted to be cuddled up and became upset when we wanted to do something else like prepare lunch or do laundry. However after giving her meds, she settled down on her rocking chair and slept. She looked so tired with black shadows under her eyes. It just breaks my heart!

The sick little girl

Another thing that made us so miserable during her sickness was her lack of appetite. She ate one or two spoonfuls of rice with chicken soup and then she was done. She refused her milk and balked at the idea of taking plain water (usually she doesn't mind drinking plain water). So it's no wonder that her body took a long time to get well because she was not getting enough nourishment.

I tried giving vitamin C tablet. She was only interested in them for a couple of days, and after that she refused that too. Then I have to force her to eat Scott's Emulsion to boost her immune system. So far she is still taking that supplement.

I'm thankful that now we are feeling generally better, although all of us still haven't fully recover from coughing. Hoping that we'll be in good health by the time the baby arrives - dear germs, please go away!

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Thursday, September 07, 2023

Sarapan Pagi di Courtyard Cafe

Sambungan dari kisah pengalaman menginap di Hotel Courtyard by Marriott Melaka tempoh hari.

Masa check-in lagi dah diberitahu sarapan hotel disediakan di Courtyard Cafe yang terletak di ground floor, bertentangan dengan lobi hotel. Jadi esok paginya kiteorang turun dalam pukul 8 pagi. Mujur tak turun lebih lambat sebab ramai tetamu hotel yang ambik pakej sarapan jugak jadi restoran hampir penuh.

Sarapan pagi di Courtyard Cafe

Mula-mula sampai, aku dapati servis di restoran ni agak kelam-kabut. Selalunya kalau dekat hotel lain, lepas staff hotel check nombor bilik dalam senarai, dia akan assign meja kosong dan bawak tetamu ke meja. Tapi dekat restoran ni kiteorang end up berjalan sekeliling restoran mencari meja kosong. Akhirnya jumpa meja kosong yang belum dikemas. Lepas tu kena tunggu pulak staff datang kemas dan setting meja. Aku husnuzon je la - mungkin restoran ni tak cukup kakitangan.

Memandangkan hotel ni baru, rekabentuk restorannya nampak moden dan luas. Penggunaan tona warna yang neutral  dalam ruang restoran dan lampu kuning keemasan menampilkan citarasa yang mewah.

Di ruang tengah, terdapat replika batang pokok manakala pembahagi ruang yang melengkung memberikan privasi kepada setiap tetamu semasa menjamu selera.

Ruang tengah restoran

Di Courtyard Cafe, sarapan berkonsepkan buffet-style. Tetamu boleh pilih untuk menjamu selera dengan bermacam-macam jenis menu baik menu lokal seperti nasi lemak, mi goreng, mihun goreng, bubur nasi berlauk, mi kari dan mi sup; ataupun menu intercontinental seperti salad, buah-buahan,  roti dan pastry, yogurt, bijirin, keju, telur, pancake, waffle dan sebagainya. Untuk minuman pulak, tetamu dihidangkan dengan jus buah-buahan, susu, kopi dan teh.

Atas - egg station, bawah - minuman berjus

Kalau pergi breakfast buffet tak kira la mana-mana hotel, yang paling popular ialah bahagian egg station. Ramai yang sanggup beratur panjang untuk pesan hidangan telur mengikut citarasa masing-masing - omelette, sunny side up, poached egg,  scrambled egg dan telur separuh masak (half boiled) antara menu yang popular di kalangan tetamu hotel. Ada satu keseronokan bila tengok chef prepare hidangan telur yang kita pesan di depan mata.

Bread & pastry

Untuk peminat pastry pulak, bahagian ni jadi tumpuan sebab menawarkan pelbagai jenis roti dan pastry - sourdough, roti penuh gandum, roti putih, bread roll, danish pastry, croissant, scones, muffin dan donut. 

Atas - kondimen untuk mi rebus dan mi kari
Bawah - buah-buahan dan candies

Atas - nasi goreng dan mi goreng, bubur nasi, samosa
Bawah - bahan sampingan untuk hidangan telur - wedges kentang, beef bacon, tomato panggang, sautéed mushroom dll.

Kalau ikutkan nafsu, memang rasa nak ambik sikit-sikit semua lauk yang ada. Tapi pagi tu aku cuma ambik roti toast, salad, poached egg, omelette, sesenduk nasi goreng dan buah-buahan. Kali ni aku pilih untuk jadi health-conscious sejak mulakan IF bulan lepas, walaupun nasi goreng tu sedap yakmat.

Dengan harga RM55nett sekepala dan 50% diskaun untuk kanak-kanak dan warga emas, peminat sarapan hotel pastinya akan berpuas hati dengan pilihan hidangan sarapan di Courtyard Cafe ni.

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