JEN’S GOT A BOYFRIEND! JEN’S GOT A BOYFRIEND! JEN’S GOT A BOYFRIEND! =)
Attention!
Kepada sesiapa yang baca story ini, lepas tu ingat aku dah jadi mak duyong pregnant, harap segera buat pembetulan otak di wad sakit mental, Batu 7. Sebenarnya ini ialah dialog yang dipanggil ‘family planning’. Segala kesulitan adalah ditanggung sendiri. Terima kasih!
Akhir-akhir ini, kami selalu berbincang soal yang serius. Soal anak. Atau sebenarnya. Aku selalu berbincang soal yang serius. Nama bakal anak. Malam semalam, lepas membaca bedtime story book (katalog IKEA!), kami berbual-bual sebelum berguling2 mendodoikan mata. Topik yang sama dibincangkan.
Aku: Tahun depan, kalau ada rezeki dapat Little Carneyz, kita nak beri nama apa?
Suami Terchenta (separa sedar): Hmm..? Tak tau. Berilah nama yang ada makna.
Aku: Orang suka nama ‘Aleeya’. Orang suka nama ‘Ayeesha’ juga, tapi mesti mak tak setuju.
Suami Terchenta: Aleeya tu ada maksud ke?
Aku: Tak tau lagi. Besok la Google jawapan standard!
Suami Terchenta: … (ntah apa2 la wife aku nih)
Aku: Ada jiran kiteorang kat Bintulu dulu, nama anak dia semua start dengan huruf ‘Q’.
Suami Terchenta: Hmm? Macam nombor plet kereta Sarawak je?
(Gedebuk! Suami Terchenta dibantai dengan sebiji bantal busuk)
Aku: Serius la! Kalau kita nak bagi nama anak, mesti la ada persamaan… baru orang tau dieorang adik-beradik!
Suami Terchenta: …
Aku: Pastu member orang ni, nama dia Mediha (hi Mediha!), suami dia nama Wan. Pastu nama anak dieorang Wan Mikhail. W & M welcomes WM. Sweet kan? Kalau kita nak ikut cam dieorang, kita nak bagi nama apa yang start ngan J ngan K?
Suami Terchenta: Oklah dengan nada tegas dan yakin!
Aku: Ok, apa?
Suami Terchenta: Kita bagi nama anak kita… JK Rowlings.
Aku: (terasa macam nak belasah dia sekali lagi, tapi tak jadi sebab rasa geli hati yang amat sangat. Dasar si Spongebob Squarepants!)
On second thoughts, kalau nama anak kami JK Rowlings binti Junaidix, kami boleh la jadi super millionaire! *ibubapa materialistik!*
Hari ini... stress lagi cari brand sample. Kepala dah terasa nak pecah!
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Shopping! Siapa tak suka shopping, sila terjun bangunan! Sebenarnya, aku suka shopping. Tapi keadaan kewangan tak selalu mengizinkan. Aku suka shopping di Ikea. Kalau aku kaya macam Paris Hilton, aku akan beli Ikea. I love Ikea! (Iklan: Next month wedding anniversary kami yang pertama, sila hadiahkan barang2 dari Ikea kepada sesiapa yang belum belikan hadiah wedding utk kami :p Muahaha!)
Tapi, yang aku tak suka ialah projek latest ini. Projek shopping mall. Trump mahu buat shopping mall. Jadi, selepas brainstorming nama2 untuk shopping mall ni (termasuk ‘Kepak’. Hahaha!), beberapa nama dah di shortlisted. Oleh sebab aku seorang sahaja kaum Hawa di dalam bilik meeting (dan kaum Hawa ialah penyumbang nombor 1 di shopping mall!), jadi Trump suruh aku pilih nama untuk shopping mall itu. WALIOWEH! Berapa kali korang berpeluang menamakan shopping mall dalam seumur hidup korang???
Probably my best working experience so far. Pilih nama shopping mall. Walaupun sebenarnya aku lebih suka nama yang ada perkataan ‘Avenue’. Aku suka bangat word ‘Avenue’ itu. Gaya, mutu, keunggulan.
Tapi kan. Itu sahaja experience yang aku suka. Lepas tu, everything is extra work for me. Sebab aku kuli. Jadi, aku yang kena buat semua kerja (Sila rujuk posting lama2 tentang kerja). Never mind. Bukankah aku akan ‘membelahkan’ diri dari sini tak lama lagi? *Menghitung hari dan jari*.
Jadi aku bersabar sahajalah.
Petang tadi. Kami meeting pasal shopping mall ini lagi. Branding consultant itu menyerahkan proposal design dan concept. Secara jujur aku ingin bagitau mereka…
I don’t like your designs. Pergi buat balik.
Tapi, mereka consultant kesukaan Trump. Kalau aku tersalah cakap, secara tak langsung, aku menempah tiket maut. Maka bonus yang ditunggu-tunggu tu akan melambai selamat tinggal kepada aku.
Have to be very careful nowadays.
Korang bayangkan design mereka sangat hambar. Ada satu warna dengan tone berbeza. Dan ada logo. That’s all.
Bagi aku apa-apa yang berkaitan dengan shopping mall mesti lah exciting. Mestilah promote lifestyle. So design harus masukkan elemen FUN, LIFESTYLE, EXCITEMENT. Design untuk marketing material shopping mall mesti CLASSY, STYLISH, TRENDY. Mesti buatkan shoppers rasa, ‘Wow! Tempat ni ada style-lah!’ Something like Pavilion KL punya brand identity. Classy.
Jadi, untuk idea brilliant aku itu, aku pulak yang kena carikan sample. Kalau macam tu, better aku yang dibayar gaji consultant? Betul tak?
Finally!
I signed up for yoga.
I signed up for yoga.
After almost a year of giving lame excuses to myself, postponing, trying to psycho myself and doing a bit of research on the its benefits, I finally found a good place to kickstart my involvement in yoga. A nice cozy studio that caters for women and children only, located in Jalan Telawi, Bangsar. As usual, my decision is made at-the-spur-of-the-moment; I called up the studio owner last Friday and on Monday, I was there for my first class. The initial investment set me back at RM300 (oh, for the sake of toned arms and body!) for a yoga mat, annual fee of RM35 and the foundation programme 8 sessions at RM200. Not to forget a new track-bottom and tight leggings which I wore inside in case the track-bottom slid down when we have to do one of those legs-up-in-the-air movement.
I changed at the office at 6pm, and by 6.30pm Suami Terchenta came to fetch me. We were rather early; the studio hadn’t even opened yet. About 10 minutes later, an Indian man came, unlocked the door and after two minutes of bickering discussing on whether to go inside, we went up after the man. It turned out that he was the instructor. I was taken aback. How am I going to take off my headscarf when doing yoga if the instructor is a man? I was doubtful and was prepared to leave with Suami Terchenta. Then again, what the heck, I’ll just keep my headscarf on if that’s the case, what’s the big deal. That was how determined I am to keep my yoga resolution.
Back to more than a year ago.
It was Abby’s idea to start yoga. Abby is my school best chum, and she has been practising yoga for more than a year. On her last visit to KL, she kept harping about the benefits of yoga. Relieve stress, improve concentration and focus, tone up body, improve flexibility and most importantly, lift up your mood. Everyone knows I’m such a moody person. Wouldn’t it be great that after going through yoga, I’d turn into a chirpy bunny? Wait a minute. Bunnies don’t chirp. But they are happy happy lot, that’s my point. Plus, who knows that from yoga, I’ll be ready to join physical activities such as jogging and playing sports? My next year’s resolution will be to become more active physically (a.k.a. lose more weight).
Coming back to yesterday.
I came to the studio yesterday for my first two sessions in the foundation programme. For the first session, there were me and another girl which I think her name is Savithri. She speaks eloquent English with a bit of British accent and she explained that she signed up with her sister but missed the first class because she had just come back from the UK. That made me feel slightly inferior – this girl must be a high-powered career woman and I am just an ordinary executive *feel small*. When the lesson started, I pushed out the negative thought so I can focus on the instructor’s instructions. We started with relaxing our mind and our body as we lie down on our yoga mat. The idea is to clear out all irrelevant thoughts, emptying our minds to prepare for the exercise. After relaxation, we sat up to do the eye practise - looking up, down, right and left – without moving our head. Then we did neck practise, rotating our neck around slowly. After that, we sat cross-legged and were taught the proper way of breathing.
‘Think of a balloon… As air comes in, the balloon expands. As the air goes out, the balloon contracts. When you watch a baby sleep, you will see that when he breathes in, his stomach swells up as air fills in. And when he exhales, his stomach goes down as air goes out. This is the proper way of breathing.’
When we both have mastered this, we went to the next level – the ‘sun salutation’ steps. The step starts with standing straight. Then as we breathe deeply, we raise our hands until our elbows are straight above our head, then we clasp our palms flat together towards our chest as we exhale. Inhale, the hands go up again and we arch our upper body as far back as we can. Exhale and we go down to touch the floor while standing with straight knees. Inhale and we kneel with one leg to the back. It goes on until we complete the steps in sequence. The first try was pretty bad. I can’t arch back, my fingers can’t reach the floor, I was often off-balance. As we repeated for several times, the movements become more fluid and easier to do. That was for the first class.
For the second session, there were five students in the class. I noted that the other ladies are all slim and have great figures. I instantly felt like Betty Suarez in Ugly Betty. Then again. Oh Carneyz, just shut up and focus on the yoga steps.
We repeated the exercises in the first session, and then moved on to more complex steps. Raise our feet up in the air while breathing in. Then slowly let down our feet while exhaling. Easy? Not if you have heavy legs and weak stomach muscles.
At the end of the yoga session, surprisingly my body feels a lot more relaxed and refreshed while my mind is clearer and lighter. I really enjoyed my first class and look forward to the second class. Only thing is, I wish I have a friend to accompany me for these classes. Then at least when there’s a need for a partner, I won’t be the only odd one out. And even though the other ladies are nice and polite, it’s very obvious that they are not interested to become friends. They already have their friend / sister who signed up with them. Or they are there to do yoga and nothing more.
So, kalau ada kawan2 yang teringin nak join yoga tapi takde teman, jom la join yoga. Best tau. Lebih2 lagi kalau yang kerjanya stress 😉
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We were staring at the news release in The Star incredulously. Me, Trump, my boss, the Finance GM. All standing and looking as if a cat had swallowed our tongues. A famous cat with red and white fur.
‘How dare they make such claims?’ Trump started.
‘With them, we are not too surprised. Their lies can be phenomenal.’ My boss quipped in.
‘What 1b?’ the Finance GM nearly choked on the figure.
‘Where 1b?’ Asked Trump.
‘This 1b.’ I jabbed a finger at the statement.
‘What 1b?’ the Finance GM was near hysterical. ‘They owe us, not invest in us that figure!’
‘The ‘bee’ in their bonnet la. That stung their brains.’ I grinned.
‘You think of something to respond to this.’ Trump gave the order and left.
‘Can I leave the counter-attack to you?’ my boss asked.
I flexed my fingers – fingers that will be responsible for the war of words in this vicious corporate battle. My fingers that will shape sentences dripping with sarcasm; sharp and piercing words to cut deeply into our opponents’ PR defence. How dare they lie to the world about what an angel they are when in truth, they are the reason why I didn’t get my Raya bonus this year.
‘Of course. Leave the battle to me. I have a double-edge strategy that I will develop further to counter their claims.’
Which reminds me why I was a debater before. I love a good fight. Especially when you throw words around.
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