Sunday, April 22, 2007

Birthday Celebration: Posting Yang Lambat

Sebenarnya dari lepas malam 12hb itu, aku mau hapdet blog yang indah2 belaka. Bukan pasal stress di ofis yang gila itu. Oops... Tak mau blog pasal yang pahit2. Kita tinggalkan dulu kepahitan itu di hujung minggu ini ya. Mari kita layan cerita ini!

Pada malam itu, aku dengan semangat waja memasak nasi ayam memandangkan menu itu yang paling cepat disediakan.

Mula2, aku potong tomato, kemudian rebus ayam dan buat sos cili (total masa= 10 minit):

Lepas tu, sediakan ayam rebus untuk dibakar dalam oven serbaguna, basuh beras dan sediakan bahan-bahan masak nasi (total masa=10 minit):

Kemudian barulah sediakan sup untuk dimakan bersama-sama nasi ayam (total masa=5 minit):


Sejam kemudian:

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Monday, April 16, 2007

Life in Corporate Communications!

Sel2 otak aku berlumba2 membunuh diri. Splat! Splat! Eek! Bunyi kematian yang menakutkan. Gara-gara aku terlalu memaksa. Terlalu demanding. Mengerahkan jabatan-jabatan serebrum dan amygdala memproses berjuta-juta maklumat dan memuntahkan produk siap dalam masa 1/1 juta saat sesuka hati aku.

Kerja-kerja aku bertaburan di atas meja. Semakin banyak maklumat. Semakin pantas usia aku menjadi pendek. Dalam masa yang sama, aku:

1. Mencari statistik dari tahun 2004 - 2006.

2. Mencari foto-foto utk corporate brochure. Aku sengal. Hari Jumaat lepas, aku terlupa save dalam satu folder. Kan dah dua kali kerja. Aku benci buat kerja yang sama. Sekali lagi, sel-sel otak aku membunuh diri kerana kecewa dengan diri-sendiri.

3. Siapkan summary market survey dalam sales proposal

4. Mencari CD original artwork yang diminta oleh agency designer. Mujur aku tak tahu Illustrator, kalau tak aku pasti menyumbangkan 'titik peluh' percuma. Seperti biasa.

Bukan aku tak biasa buat dua atau tiga kerja dalam satu masa. Aku dilahirkan Gemini, memang sudah nature aku untuk buat multi-tasking. Tapi kali ini sangat urgent. Orang atasan aku buat hal durjana. Bukan ke sudah berabad lamanya aku ingatkan:

A. Corporate brochure sudah mau habis, bos. Tolong check maklumat yang aku dah bersusah-payah mengejar semua pihak yang terlibat untuk submit SECEPAT MUNGKIN! supaya aku boleh serahkan kat designer sebulan yang lalu.

Bos aku bergoyang kaki kanan dan kiri. Mengecek emel. Mengecek sapa yang tersingkir dari American Idol. Mengecek apa yang terjadi dalam sinetron kesukaannya.'I'll have a look at it later.' Hasilnya, sekarang semua orang kejar department kami mintak corporate brochure SECEPAT MUNGKIN! Baru la dia kelam-kabut mintak agency cepatkan printing. Walhal baru minggu lepas submit. Trump pun belum approve. Aku tak tahu nak kasihan siapa. Agency atau aku sendiri. Rasanya lebih berfaedah kasihankan diri-sendiri. Kesiannya aku.

B. Bulan lepas aku bilang pada bos: Sebelum BD busy buat exhibition, baik kita cari supplier booth kita kerana booth yang lama perlu tukar baru. Maklumatnya sudah outdated.

Bos aku kata ok biar dia yang buat. Aku busy sebab update corporate brochure dan siapkan market survey. Lagi perlu update promosi laman web. Lagi perlu siapkan design signage baru. Maklum la, aku kuli. Khamis lepas. Seperti yang aku jangka, BD mintak booth. Bos aku baru kelam-kabut contact supplier. Visual booth perlu usai cepat-cepat sebelum Jumaat ni. Padahal deliver period 10 working days. Hari ni baru mereka hantar design. Huduh. Tapi sebab dah urgent, tak boleh berlenggang-kangkung cerewet. Aku bagitau Chairman, apa2 yang terjadi, bukan salah aku. Aku sudah nak termuntah ingatkan bos aku supaya setelkan bendalah ni bulan lepas.

Banyak lagi yang aku tak puas hati tapi aku tak boleh buat apa2. Sebab. Aku kuli, dia bos. Aku buat cepat-cepat pun, akan jadi lambat jugak. Akhir-akhir ni aku nak berbaik-baik dengan Trump. Tak mahu benci-benci dengan Trump. Tak mahu gaduh-gaduh dengan Trump. Tapi aku cuma berdiri di sebalik bayang-bayang bos. Bila bos buat durjana, pasti Trump akan ingat aku pun terlibat sama. Aku pun pekerja yang lembab. Tak efektif, inovatif, kreatif, dan segala macam 'if'.

Aku sudah buat yang terbaik, Trump! Sila hantar bos aku pergi training untuk kasi dia motivasi sepanjang tahun!

Huh. Macam la Trump pernah membaca ayat-ayat durjana aku di sini. Sekian.

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Thursday, April 12, 2007

Happy Birthday, Suami Terchenta

Dearest Suami Terchenta,

Today I woke up to a special day. Although yesterday was like any other day, except for the time I was 'merajuk' for 10 minutes after you spitted that chocolate bean I tried to force-feed you while you were driving just because I played a trick on you when I held on to the chocolate from your wide, open mouth. I'm sorry I did that, but it seriously made me roar in laughter to see your outrageous expression after you realised what I had done. Then we made up and spent the night watching CSI - with your chest as my pillow and you sleeping as usual.


What makes today a special day is that it is your 28th birthday. 28 years + 9 months 10 days of living on God's earth. I'm so proud of you, suami terchenta. In that 28 years of life, you have been in a relationship only once - and that is with me. That is just to name a few more about you that makes me want to cry in joy and happiness at marrying you.

Coincidentally, today marks 120 days of our marriage (yes, exactly!) and you have never snored, not even once. Throughout our 4 months of being together, I conclude that living with a messy person is not such a bad thing after all, although at an earlier stage, I experienced a bout of moodiness due to my stress at the sight of your clothes / papers / wires / mugs / Godknowswhatelse lying on the floor everywhere. Nowadays, I live with it. I even support you by contributing to the mess. M-E-S-S is ok as long as we don't breed maggots and cockroaches and other creepy-crawlies. However, I would appreciate it much better if you do vacuum the carpet at least every 2 weeks so we can be reminded that our carpet is green in colour.

You are such a wonderful person, you. When you are not busy in front of your laptop or sleeping in front of tv, you help me in the kitchen or throw away rubbish or do the laundry. The only task you hate is ironing your clothes which I don't mind doing because I am in love with the purple iron. If you had bought any other colour, I wouldn't be doing so much ironing too. Thank God for the purple iron.

I also discovered that after we got married, you tend to forgot a few things you promised to do before we signed the marriage certificate. Like singing to me before I sleep. But it's ok because you made it up with other things, like paying the bills and the house rent. Haha, I kid, I kid. You sing when I am fully awake, changing the lyrics as you like to show your devotion to me. I especially like your version of Sheila On 7 song, 'Ku petik bintang...' because yours sound better. After all, this is the first time you sing out loud much to my credit because I sing as and when I feel like singing and you caught my singing bug after we live together.

My dear Suami Terchenta,

As we settled into our married life, we seem to be more in sync with each others' thoughts. When I am thinking of watching a movie, you already booked the tickets. When you feel hungry, I already ordered what you want to eat because I feel like eating that too. Of course you don't know that when you are already asleep, I plug into your brain and upload my life program inside it so you think and feel like me. It's like the Briefcase application in Windows, only so much better. Tonight, when you sleep, I will upload Langkawi_Holiday.exe into your brain, hubby dearest. You are going to love it.

Talking about holiday, as my birthday treat to you, I am whisking you away to another city and we are going to stay at a four-star hotel. Instead of jumping up in joy and clapping your hands enthusiastically, you frown and tell me, 'Duit minyak! Duit tol! Duit makan! Blabla...' even though I told you that it's a birthday treat i.e. I will pay for everything. Perhaps this is one folder in your brain I should hide for a while, the Financial_Situation folder.

I am more to the kind of person who wake up and think I want to go to Africa, and I pack up and go. Where else you will make a more rational decision. In one way, it is good to have someone to keep the reality checks. But this is the time where we want to be and to go and to do whatever crosses our minds before our biology clock starts ticking! Once we have kids, we'll think a trillion times about going bungee-jumping because if we smash our heads, who will take care of them? In conclusion, let's go bungee-jumping, sweety-pie.

But that is not the only present you get this year. I am glad you like that new laptop backpack I gave you. When you come and fetch me later, I will surprise you with a fruit cheese cake I baked in the office today (haha!) And tonight, I am thinking of preparing nasi ayam that you love.

I want you to know that I love being married to you and I love teasing you and I love looking at your gobsmackingly handsome face and I love laughing at your jokes and making you laugh. I love falling asleep in your arms and waking up to your voice and hugs. I love loving you, Suami Terchenta. Happy Birthday.

Love,

Wife Terchenta.

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Tuesday, April 10, 2007

Where The Solution Is Just a Click Away

I was wrestling with the P&L statement for March sales which can get extremely confusing as I have to refer to three different spreadsheets simultaneously.

In the midst of this fight for sanity, I was interrupted by my colleague calling out in frustration, 'How do I make these as secondary bullets??!'

I walked and stared at the monitor. He was preparing a PowerPoint presentation and having a problem trying to get a list of text to go under the main point as sub-points. In vain, he selected the list, clicked and un-clicked the 'Numbers & Bullets' button several times.

'Let me.' I took the mouse, pointed towards the 'Indent' button and clicked. 'Tadah!'

Immediately, the list jumped one-inch to the right, bullets and all.

'That's it??? I spent five minutes trying to do it and you just clicked once???'

'Which explains why Trump never fires me no matter how bloody rude I am.'

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Friday, April 06, 2007

Apple Pie Ala McD & Gathering Msjbox

Cerita #1: Kisah Apple Pie
Para pembaca yang budiman,

Minggu ni aku kerap mengeksperimen toaster oven hadiah perkahwinan kami. Aku sungguh teruja dengan oven tu akhir ini. Teruja untuk menghasilkan makanan yang enak-enak untuk santapan suami terchenta. Semoga dia akan bawa aku bercuti-cuti Malaysia lepas ni (mata bersinar-sinar dengan harapan) Huhu.

Dan semalam, aku teruja sekali lagi untuk cuba buat apple pie yang macam kat McD. Dengan berbekal semangat waja dan Google, aku carik resipi apple pie yang lazat, lemak berkrim & disukai ramai. Akhirnya aku terjumpa:

Apple Pie

Kulit / Crust:

• 2 cawan tepung multi-purpose (aku guna tepung gandum je sbb tu je ada kat rumah)
• 1 sudu besar gula
• 1 sudu teh garam
• 6 sudu besar mentega
• 6-8 sudu besar air ais (sejuk)

*Gaul semua sampai jadi doh yang tak melekat / lembik, pastu balut dalam plastik & simpan dalam peti sejuk selama 20 minit

Isi / filling:

• Epal sebiji dua - dipotong dadu (aku potong sesuka hati sambil sekejap2 berlari ke ruang tamu tengok rancangan kesukaan aku, CSI)
• Sepatutnya rendam dalam air + 1 sudu jus lemon tapi aku takde jus lemon so aku tak rendam.
• 1 sudu besar gula
• 1 sudu teh serbuk kayu manis (cinnamon)
• 1/4 sudu teh garam
• 1 sudu besar tepung
• 1 sudu besar cuka (rumah kami takde cuka, jadi aku gantikan dengan jus limau nipis)

*Gaul semua bahan2 termasuk epal

1. Keluarkan doh, bahagi dua dan leperkan dengan roller. (Sekali lagi, tiada perkakas seperti itu di teratak miskin kami jadi aku terpaksa guna gelas je. Doh aku memang fail tapi aku teruskan jugak hasrat buat pai epal)
2. Taburkan epal dan bahan2 atas doh, tutupkan dengan doh satu lagi tapi sebelum tu taruk la 4 sudu teh mentega di atas inti untuk menambahkan kesedapan. Last sekali, bakar dalam oven sampai masak. Tapi tolong jangan tiru aku ya puan-puan, bakar pai sampai terbakar kulitnya.

Apple Pie aku yang hangus!

Jadi, lepas ni kalian semua tak perlu berebut-rebut beli apple pie di kedai roti / McD, sebab resipi ni setanding rasanya dengan apple pie di luar! Marveles, kan? ;)

Cerita #2: Gath Terkejut

Hari Selasa lepas, sedang aku berhempas-pulas menyiapkan design corporate brochure, suami terchenta telefon.

Suami Terchenta: Petang ni kita pergi Kajang, geng Msjbox buat gath sempena Fysal datang.

Aku: OK - ( jawapan skema seorang wife yang taat tapi dalam hati: Uwaa! Mesti tak sempat nak tengok Ugly Betty, Supernatural & Desperate Housewives!)

Suami terchenta: Abang datang amik pukul 6 tau?

Petang tu, Suami Terchenta datang amik di ofis sebelum bertolak. Kata suami terchenta, 'Dah tukar tempat gath pulak. Sekarang kat KLCC.' Maka berlari lah si Sang Kancil kami ke KLCC. Lepas masuk parking yang mahal tu, Suami Terchenta dapat tahu pulak gath bukan di KLCC! Tidaak! Ditukar ke Wisma Central pulak. Ni ialah gath yang sangat full of surprise.

Sampai di Pelita, dari jauh nampak tiga jejaka mengangkat tangan macam nak jawab soalan cepumas. Rupa-rupanya tu ialah Sodep, Azkam dengan Chot. Kami join dan borak-borak sementara tunggu yang lain-lain datang (Kak Retna, Shai, Umie & Kak Shida).

Dipendekkan citer, borak-borak di situ sampai pukul 10 malam. Lepas tu baru semua bersurai. Aku & Suami Terchenta offer diri hantar Fysal ke rumah pak sedaranya.

Chot ada amik gambar. Dalam banyak-banyak gambar, aku paling berkenan gambar di bawah. Sebab apa? Sebab Suami Terchenta tengah gelak macam ni la masa aku mula-mula terjatuh chenta sama itu suamiku 3 tahun lepas:

Suami Terchenta

Apapun, terima kasih kepada semua pengguna Msjbox kerana menyokong titik peluh Suami Terchenta yang banyak berkorban demi Msjbox nya ini! ;)

P/S: Tido lambat lagi sebab hapdet blog. Huarrghhh... zzzz...

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