My new colleague told me,

'Every sufferings you endure in this world, you'll get a bonus point up there.' He pointed to heaven's way.

'... Every sufferings you endure patiently.' I replied, almost impatiently.

'Every sufferings you endure patiently, you get extra bonus.' He counter-replied. Heck. Who am I to refute him? He studies Islam teachings and he knows all the Hadiths. I figure out his family is deeply religious.

I am suffering even more as a little voice inside me making me even more curiga. Mia, who's betraying, and who's being betrayed? I shall not throw accusations even in anger, until I have proof but God, give me more strength to be patient. God, I say that as a prayer. When I wake up, when I ride my bike, when I work, when I sleep.

'Even when you say 'Lailahailallah Muhammadarrasulullah, that is also a prayer in the sense that you show submission unto Him.'